Tips to avoid having the children caught in the crossfire:
1. Make sure your children understand that they are not the reason for the divorce. Keep the explanation simple, “your mother and I can no longer live together happily. You need to know that this has nothing to do with you. Your mom and I both love you very much and nothing will change that.”
2. Take care when discussing litigation. Your children do not need to know the sum and substance of all legal documents, depositions, and proceedings.
3. Allow the children to love both parents. Create an environment where the children can be free to love both parents.
4. Do not send messages through your children. If you are unable to communicate by any means with your ex whether in-person, by phone, or e-mail, you may wish to consider co-parenting counseling or request a parent coordinator.
5. Do not say disparaging things about the other parent in front of the children. Judges will expect you to be supportive of the children’s relationship with their other parent.
6. Be supportive of your children’s activities. If at all possible, take your children to their activities when it is “your time.” On the other hand, be respectful of the other parent’s time with the children.
7. Use good judgment before introducing your children to someone you are dating.
8. Take the high road when possible.
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